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Saturday I learned …

April 7, 2014

On Saturday I did step out of my comfort zone; but this is nothing new. I have spent my life in vulnerable situations; not life or death but pretty precarious sometimes.  However, I do know from experience (note to myself to remember this fact) that the anticipation is always worse than the event.

I always over prepare and over read events,  it began as a child a a defense tool.  I had a difficult and exacting mother who didn’t take prisoners or give the benefit of   doubt. Gone was the adage ‘innocent until proven guilty’.  

It doesn’t stop me doing new and exciting things I have had a good and rich life. However, it does stop me enjoying and relaxing at the circus!

Saturday was a tiny case in point.  I was looking forward to this particular class,I had been ‘planning’ to do learn a new skill (how does one do that? It is either new or not)

Long before, I had the materials I needed and even some examples of ‘things I had done earlier ( See what I mean. I was already for the put downs!)

I was even questioning my ability to draw a straight line; artist was no longer in my vocabulary.

I do not regret the preparation; I spent many happy hours playing with new inks, rollers and paper … it was just the ‘opportune’ cloud that come down to  bring doubt and negative thoughts.

Meanwhile water has flowed under the bridge and I stemmed the tide … I did learn to do simple mono-printing.

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